How To Be The Best Husband In The World
Hi, I am a husband, and have been for five years, and throughout that entire time, I am, and continue to be, a perfect husband. My wife tells me all the time to “stop bragging” and “to help out please” because she knows I’m so good at what I do. Since “my wife” (said/read in a Borat voice) exclaims that “I’m not needed right now and just because you ask if I need help doesn’t mean you’re helping,” I am choosing to offer my expertise on how to be the best partner to your spouse.
1. Listen
It’s so easy to hear your significant other talk about the nonsense of their job or the exclusion they’re feeling from their friends, or how their pregnancy is making them nauseous and anxious, but the difficult thing is to listen. I mean really listen. There are always keywords that allow you to give a perfect default response. When you listen for the word help, always respond with “Coming,” even if you have no plans to actually be there. They usually figure it out and, sometimes, if you’re lucky, you’ll get a very strong “thank you for all of your help” when it’s all done.
2. Support Them in Their Endeavors
My partner works in medicine, so I make it my job to not take care of myself so they can nurse me back to health and thus, practice getting good at their craft. After taking my temperature, I ask if they want to role play and they jokingly respond, “I don’t like to take my work home with me.” I also love that they laugh at all of my jokes. It’s shocking how funny I am but how few people actually laugh when I finish a story with, “jokes.” My S.O. gets it though. They’re one of the cool ones.
3. Learn About Their Hobbies
Supporting their endeavors doesn’t always mean helping them with their career. Most people have free time and hobbies that aren’t binging Netflix shows. So remind your spouse that while you should be applying for new jobs “to help out financially,” that you, too, have taken up hobbies, like juggling. Start juggling in front of them when they’re trying to relax, preparing for a big meeting, or when they ironically tell you “not to juggle right now, I’m not in the mood.” My spouse is just so darn funny.
4. Befriend Their Friends
It’s important that both spouses have lives outside of each other. It’s healthy to take a break. However, if you don’t have a lot of friends of your own, it’s more than ok to befriend your significant other’s friends. Then, when you get close to them, start inviting them out on nights your spouse has to work late so you don’t have to continue rubbing your naval in front of the television or “looking for jobs.” That way when your partner stops getting invited to group hangouts because their friends find their partner “deeply disturbing” you get them all to yourself. And time alone is really what marriage is all about.
5. Don’t Assume
It’s always best to check in with your significant other and ask them face to face, what’s on their mind, why are they so angry with you, and what you should have done differently so you can grow from past mistakes. In an ideal world, when you apologize, you’re actually promising you won’t repeat those mistakes; but as we know from the news cycle we don’t live in an ideal world. So say sorry and move on. A relationship is a two way street and if your partner can’t see that you just are the way you are, then that’s on them and you can’t control that. All you can control is you. And you are the best husband in the world.